out of control

xochelly @ 2004-06-29T18:25:00

2004-06-29T22:26:16Z

new journal

chelsafina

yearbooks

2004-05-28T02:27:08Z

when i get my yearbook every year, i feel like another year has passed and i missed out on doing all the things i wanted to do but never got around to doing.

things i wanted to do this year
- get a boyfriend who would mean a lot to me
- pass all my classes at least one quarter out of the year
- find out everything i could about my dads death
- learn at least one thing from one class
- have a good conversation with my mom
- have a good conversation with my boyfriend (if i got one)
- be kissed

things i accomplished
- joshua kennedy = boyfriend
- passed all my classes this quarter.. i think
- learned at least one thing from latin class
- got kissed (YEP)
- had a good conversation or 100 with josh

later.

xochelly @ 2004-05-25T23:24:00

2004-05-26T03:32:04Z

lately ive been wondering about stuff.

have you ever found somebody you want to do anything for, and you would do anything for, but they're not your 'fantasy' guy/girl? and it makes you feel like they're not the right person?

have you ever given your heart and body to somebody only to realize they don't feel the same way? or have you ever wanted something to last a short time, and it ended up being the best long relationship of your life?

if josh and i dont last over the summer i might be crushed. i thought i would be surprised if it lasted four months, but then when i realize that it lasted four months without any big fights (arguments we have had), and i thought that i would be kind of upset, i always liked being single, and now it's kind of like, i like josh a lot. boys. ugh.. they're so confusing.

our song is smile by g-unit. everyone..go download it :)

i like melissas question of the day.. so ill give myself a question of the week.

question of the week
*is it okay to fall head over heels in love with somebody youve only known and dated for like four months?

update

2004-05-24T23:17:19Z

well, i just got the internet turned on at the apartment.

preg tests were negative.

more later..

juice these hos; what.

2004-05-16T23:06:48Z

pregnancy test results tomorrow.

i love josh.

hes perfect.

perfect x10.

i guess.

i hope.

fuck up x100

2004-05-08T19:44:20Z

im dumb. and grounded until may 17th from friends; grounded from my cell phone until june 11; grounded from the house phone until may 15th. [edit]grounded until may 15th[/edit]

changes

2004-04-26T19:06:04Z

"hey chelly its christina... why do you want to quit barbizon???because you had one downfall???thats not the OLD chelly i used to know...before you had all your new friends , you weren't like that.i don't know what to say.i'm not blaming them at all.i'm trying to get across the point that you've changed recently...and i'm not really happy with it. and besides , barbizon cost more than a thousand dollars.I know because i'm in it too , but a differen't location.IM me mmk??I gotta talk to you<33333
~Christina"

ever since josh and i started going out like 4 million people have told me that ive changed and i dont know what to say. i havent noticed a change.. well i have.. but who knows.

its almost like i miss my old self so much that i cant function anymore being who i am now but i cant change

xochelly @ 2004-04-13T18:41:00

2004-04-13T22:42:29Z

my mom hates me.

she read my diary.

josh and i have been going out for two months.

i want to quit barbizon.

birthday

2004-04-06T21:23:16Z

my birthday party was a disaster.
except for the four hours that josh and i spent making out.

ok, thats it. thats all that happened.

my moms gonna pop a cap in katie warners moms ass.

omg like woah

2004-04-01T03:00:20Z

rumors are stupid

- yes, josh spent the night at my house
- no, im not prude
- my mom is 43, not 17
- i didnt die (thanks to whoever started that one)
- im not a druggie
- im not in the basement (obviously)
- im not a filthy slut

my life is out of control

2004-03-28T21:22:41Z

this weekend i had modeling on saturday, & i went over to emilys afterwards. it was me, josh, emily, kj, rj & 2 kids i dont know. we walked around coach lantern, watched parts of resident evil, snuck out to be cold & not see josh & kj.. who knows.

im confused about everything.
i want to know whats been happening.
i just dont know anymore.

joshs hair is funny.
emilys is funny.
boys are really, really, really stupid when it comes to stealing cars.

i cant tell my mom anything anymore. she doesnt understand.

i wonder if im a good kisser or a bad kisser.
i think im a bad kisser.
i like kissing josh i should do it more often.

lovesick

2004-03-25T00:32:39Z

i love josh kennedy.

xochelly @ 2004-03-22T21:14:00

2004-03-23T02:17:52Z

updates

-josh and i broke up, but were back together now
-josh and i had our 1 month aniversary
-heather and kj are going out
-emily spent friday, saturday and sunday night at my house
-mel and i are going through bad boy crisis
-my mom and i are moving

ive entered the 'i want to date a bad kid' stage of my life. and.. yeah. i cant explain it but i know theres something wrong with it but i know i like it.

my dad died in september. he was a dealer. am i trying to find some kind of.. comfort.. by hanging out with the people im hanging out with? i really dont know anymore. i cant think about it. i want it all to disappear but be okay.

xochelly @ 2004-03-21T17:57:00

2004-03-21T22:59:05Z

detective kennedy is a bad boy.

i bought handcuffs.

birthday party

2004-03-18T01:42:16Z

the official guest list

- emily bruce
- mel donahue
- jenn dandro
- josh kennedy

there are like 7 people i can have.
if you want to come, you need to be my friend.

okay dokay.

who gives a shit

2004-03-13T00:22:09Z

updates on my life

- josh and i got in a fight, but we're super okay now
- she needs to stop flirting with josh
- josh and i have been going out for a month as of wednesday
- im cute, josh is cute = we're cute together
- josh is not in the basement anymore
- snuck out for the weekend

this past weekend i went to emily's after school an i stayed at sams with her that night (after a lovely afternoon with nick murdock, josh, sam, emily, kevin and some john kid). then saturday i hung out with josh, sam, kevin and emily, and then i went home sunday. home to = getting kicked out of my grandparents. yeah, my bad, so sad, too bad.

i dropped my cell in sam's hot tub friday night (i guess). it was a bad weekend because i dont remember a lot, but i had my VERY FIRST KISS EVER and so other then not remembering the phone part, it rocked.

i got a flip phone and new ringtones. they own everything.

i plan on spending more time with the loveliest people ever. they are fucking awesome, and i suggest you do that to. anyways, everything is pretty much going my way. tomorrow after tanning i am definitely going tanning with mel, tesha and emily. <3

you know it BITCH

2004-03-05T02:28:10Z

NATIONAL V UNIT DAY..TOMORROW YOU MUST WORSHIP MEL DONAHUE AND JOSH RICHARDSON BECAUSE THEY ARE V UNIT AND THEY OWN YOU BEEEEEYATCH!!! SEND THIS TO 10 PPL IN THE NEXT HOUR OR BE SCHOOOOOLED!

survey

2004-03-03T23:22:55Z

Favorite
Article of Clothing: weathervane jeans
Color of the Sky: purple sunsets
Drink: coke
Thing to Do When You're Alone: sleep an read magazines

Choose
Hug or Kiss: hug
Fireplace or Bonfire: bonfire
Bed or Couch: bed
Snow or Rain: rain

How Many
People Have You Hugged Today: just josh
People Have You Kissed: none..
Regrets Have You Had in the Past Week: none!
People Do You Feel Safe With: everyone

im not crazy..

2004-03-02T22:27:49Z

lately ive been feeling all discombobulated. like im not myself.. i havent eaten in like 4 days, i havent been sleeping, i havent been paying attention in class. my grades went from A's in certain classes to being C's right now, & its not at all like me. i dont have any feelings either.. its just me and my obsession with making sure i exist.. & worrying that josh is gonna dump me.

shafman275 (6:15:23 PM): filthy slut

yeah, of course thats me. what the fuck ever.

this weekend

2004-03-01T22:34:40Z

friday night: tesha called me nd dragged me off to vacationland with zach & two seniors where i got made fun of by some completely fucked up chick. the guys played some pool and they were bowling when we left at like 10:30.

saturday: went to barbizon & i saw brianna for the first time in FOREVER. she is amazingly amazing. we had tons of bubbly fun modeling haha.

sunday: i woke up at like one & headed off to the mall with josh, tesha & kj. we walked around but they wouldnt let me sleep on the couch in macys.. haha. i absolutely love josh.

well that was my weekend.. hope ya'lls went excellent too.

stupid fucking plastic water bottles

2004-02-25T20:01:15Z

ok. guys have this queer obsession with water bottles and taking them from me. im serious. especially if theyre not going out with me.

i love josh. i love josh. i love josh. i love josh. i love josh. i love josh. i love josh. i love josh. and i thought yall should know that.

Teddy (8:36:52 PM): i knew it
Lilflirty402 (8:36:56 PM): no u didnt
Teddy (8:37:13 PM): yea i did
Lilflirty402 (8:37:22 PM): no u didnt
Teddy (8:38:23 PM): yea i did
Lilflirty402 (8:38:29 PM): no u didnt im srry no u didnt.
Teddy (8:38:56 PM): i did to
Lilflirty402 (8:39:06 PM): nah your frontin
Teddy (8:39:52 PM): no im not
Lilflirty402 (8:40:01 PM): yes you are i know this stuff
Teddy (8:40:12 PM): yea w.e

MOST DEFINITELY WOAH.

Your True Nature by llScorpiusll
Username
The quality that most appeals to you:	Beauty
In a survival situation, you:	Fight, and enjoy it
Your hidden talent is:	Seeing the best in others
Your gift is:	Genius
In groups, you:	Don't fit in
Your best quality is:	Your indomitable will
Your weakness is:	Your overbearing nature

Created with quill18's MemeGen 2.0!

pow

2004-02-23T01:35:36Z

Your Superhero Persona by couplandesque
Your Name
Superhero Name	The Bankruptcy Lawyer
Super Power	X-Ray Vision
Enemy	Martha Stewart
Mode Of Transportation	Cadillac With Rims
Weapon	A Stapler

Created with quill18's MemeGen 2.0!

50 first dates

2004-02-21T17:49:52Z

last night josh, mel, josh's friend & i went to go see 50 first dates at cinemagic. we were gonna see girl next door or something like that but we ended up just seeing 50 first dates. it was funny.. i liked it a lot. & i love josh.

my mom found out they're tearing our house down in december so we have to move out by like november & my mom said that were probably gonna have to move to sopo.. n i dont wanna leave scarborough at all i love it here. im always like yeah i hate scarborough but now that i actually have to leave my best friends like mel & my boyfriend i really REALLY would rather not.. we're going today to look at a house in sopo an an apartment on the eastern (western?) prom.. ughf.

<3
chel

BNL concert

2004-02-18T17:40:13Z

last night i went to the barenaked ladies concert with mel. it was off the hook, really. i loved it. i got great pics n we had great seats. they played the if i had a million dollars song last, n i absolutely loveddd it. with a capital L. haha. gavin degraw and this australian girl named butterfly were the opening acts, gavin was hot. yeah, i got a hat too.

barbizon & jasons

2004-02-15T16:50:07Z

barbizon: it was pretty fun except for some stupid bitches who were starting shit about xavier.. there's a new kid named sean n he's hot. haha we went to bk for lunch n then sean, xavier, jen, brigid n i went to the park to eat lunch. it was freezing but it was fun. seans 16 n he lives near boston.. how sad.. anyways yeah. i sat with vanit on the bus ride back to maine he's so funny.

jason's: we got to jason's at like 8:30ish n i got CANDY. hot with a capital H. lol yeah, but i mentioned that i had a boyfriend n jason totally ignored me which made me feel shitty.. so i left this morning around 9:30.

i think im going tanning later.. i need to get some color on my skin, so yeah.

why do guys have to be so weird when you have a bf?